Napa Valley Madness

I'm a terrible blogger. I'm even pretty bad at wii it turns out. Commitment is not my strongest suit. Well unless we're talking about commitment to other people...I'm very committed to people...even if I forget to call most of my friends. But I mean if you asked Brady he would say I am committed. Perhaps too committed really. Or should be committed...as in to an insane asylum. But my point is that I haven't really stuck to any of my grand plans, although I am feebly trying to stick to weight watchers with a sort of depressing determination made all the more sad by my constant failures.

But that's not what I'm here to write about today folks. Nope. No more complaining about my lack of follow through.

Brady and I are going on a Napa Valley spa weekend. And in trying to select a place to stay and a place to spa I learned some important things. Should you ever try to plan a spa retreat to napa valley, you would do well to know these things too:

1) You can't stay in Napa for just one Saturday night. Apparently, it's just not done. You may want to stay just Saturday night, but you will inevitably be disappointed by the "Minimum 2-night stay" notices posted on every website. Seriously, it's bad news when even the Best Western has a 2 night minimum.

2) If you find a place that will allow you to stay for one night, they will charge you much more than you ever wanted to spend to stay at something that looks like a 1950's motel. Even if you opt for the places that yelp claims are basically disgusting, you'll be paying $150 a night. And what's more, you'll be thinking, wow that's cheap.

3) Just set aside about $400 for this excursion. It's gonna be expensive. Your boyfriend...er, whoever you are going with... better like his birthday getaway. Like, a lot.

4) If mudbaths are your thing, or if they are your entire reason for picking Calistoga as a vacation destination, you should know that most places require you to get naked in front of strangers. Apparently, you have to do the mudbath with someone that you don't know. I have this horrifying image of being naked with a stranger, trying to climb into a tall tub filled with hot mud and then trying to get out again, covered in mud and slipping around as I am wont to do. I think the funniest image is trying to wash the mud off (and out of some of my more sensitive areas) while another naked lady does the same. Anyway, when I told Brady, he was horrified and told me to find a place where we could be together. I did. Which brings me to...

5) If you find a couples mudbath place....it's going to be sort of tacky. I wouldn't think that would be the case in such a swanky town, but, well, I've looked at them all. I've read every yelp review. It's just sort of tacky to take mud baths with your boyfriend. I'm learning to deal.

6) By the time you finish planning your insane vacation you will need a spa vacation. Which is lucky, since hopefully, you were successful in your planning.

So Brady and I are staying here:


And we will be doing this:


Yep. See what I mean about cheesy?

Anyway, the trip is still a week away, so I'll have to let you know how it goes. It's an adventure.